I continue to find it difficult being part of my family during family occassions because I feel so empty and incomplete from within without Tanya. Although I am convinced that she is constantly with me in spirit yet, somehow, her physical absence is something I am not able to get used to. Maybe as time goes by I will be able to carry this constant feeling of heaviness with more grace.
Anjali and Bob make me so happy yet that persistant feeling of emptiness follows me everywhere. I am afraid to let my guard down as I just don't want Anjali to feel I love her any less and would never want her to feel unhappy.
I have always wanted to see both Anjali and Tanya happy, as their happiness was mine and it is for this reason that I let them go and follow their dreams...now I am so glad I did.